Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I think I sprained my soul last night
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize