you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize