I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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