No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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