im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
