im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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