I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!