Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!! http://tfl.nu/gjd6
  Replies (8) Good night (4636) Bad night (812)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.

  (1-907): View more from Alaska

  Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy. (1-907): Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more.. http://tfl.nu/8g8e
  Replies (45) Good night (7424) Bad night (808)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around http://tfl.nu/e0gz
  Replies (14) Good night (2166) Bad night (5921)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist. http://tfl.nu/4hjw
  Replies (4) Good night (953) Bad night (3777)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life http://tfl.nu/jc1p
  Replies (13) Good night (3670) Bad night (1124)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning http://tfl.nu/dryp
  Replies (22) Good night (5839) Bad night (1089)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (225): Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again http://tfl.nu/n0xl
  Replies (5) Good night (3132) Bad night (1055)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower. http://tfl.nu/q0tv
  Replies (6) Good night (858) Bad night (2519)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  The key to alley sex is drunkeness.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): The key to alley sex is drunkeness. http://tfl.nu/zhh3
  Replies (7) Good night (2197) Bad night (784)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks. http://tfl.nu/kgtb
  Replies (12) Good night (2966) Bad night (905)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore. http://tfl.nu/9p2a
  Replies (4) Good night (1317) Bad night (815)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high. http://tfl.nu/x992
  Replies (7) Good night (702) Bad night (1421)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before. http://tfl.nu/yjkb
  Replies (2) Good night (1075) Bad night (374)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl. http://tfl.nu/btqg
  Replies (1) Good night (1307) Bad night (746)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving. http://tfl.nu/w6a6
  Replies (2) Good night (296) Bad night (417)

Randomize