like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize