you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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