I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
They have beer where we have blood.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Randomize
