everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize