He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
foreskin is a definite game changer
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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