your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I just blew my weed a kiss
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
