You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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