Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Bring me that man meat
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize