I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
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