I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
it glows. i had to have it.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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