Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
