fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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