I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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