I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
