I'm going to rape someone's good day.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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