check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
