I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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