tell your sister to shave her snatch
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
