Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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