she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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