we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
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This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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