I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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