I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize
