If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
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i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
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Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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