i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize