I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
did you just send me my own nude
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
