and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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