It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
