Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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