What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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