hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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