So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
