Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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