She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
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Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
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He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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