He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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