no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
