Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
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