Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
