How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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