Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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