He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
