and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Lo siento on account of my penis...
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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