I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
