even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
